Wedding Etiquette: Responsibilities of the Mother of the Bride

Exactly what role does the mother of the bride play during her daughter's wedding. The primary responsibility is to see that the bride's wishes are carried out the bride's way. It will be the mother of the bride's responsibility to help the bride plan her wedding with her own tastes in mind…not the mother's, unless, it is the true desire of the bride to "let mom run things." Below is a list of rules that highlight the traditional responsibilities of the mother of the bride.


Mother of the Bride's Responsibilities:

• Help the bride select her wedding attire. Remember, this is not your wedding. If you find yourself talking the bride out of a gown she loves, you may be overreaching.
  Help the bride and groom decide on a wedding budget. Settling money issues upfront is always best. A good clear budget will help everyone with their expectations.
• In the event that the Mother of the Groom does not contact you, you will make the first contact.
• See that the guest lists are put together. The invitations must be ordered as soon as possible, and the guest list will be critical in making your invitation order.
• Reservations for out-of-town guests, invited by the bride's family, are the responsibility of the mother of the bride. It will be much more convenient if a block of rooms are reserved at a nearby hotel, which is near her home.
• Choose your gown for the wedding day. Immediately tell the Mother of the Groom the colors and style so that she may begin looking for a complimentary gown. Send a swatch of material to the Mother of Groom if possible.
• See that instructions for the actual ceremony are given. This includes the seating schedule and the receiving line at reception, as well as any special touches the bride may choose to have at her wedding.
• The role as mother of the bride, in the ceremony, may include lighting the family candle on the altar, along with the mother of the groom. Family candles are lit after the candle lighters have left the altar area, and prior to the entrance of the wedding party.
• Find a trusted friend or family member who is not in the wedding party to assist you throughout the wedding. You are the hostess for the entire event! Find someone who will help you with some of the details…sometimes a professional is best.
• Be familiar with the responsibilities of the Maid of Honor. You may want to have a conversation with the Maid of Honor to coordinate and avoid stepping on each other's toes.

Photo courtesy of eHow
Rules courtesy of Our Marriage